ian mcdougall
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  • Out & about
  • Grumpy Old Fart
PicturePhoto source unknown
KEV - THE MUSICAL … OR MAYBE THE MELODRAMA

Caution: Here be swearing. Think of this as an overture.

Kev is all around us

We see him on the tellie
We hear him on the news
Kev is all around us
Blue tie and glossy shoes

The mindless media follow
him everywhere he goes,
So if you really love him
Vote Kev and let him know

He knows you love him, (and you, too, cuz)
His mind's made up by the
polls that he does
He’s out there grinning
And when he bends
the sun shines out, you can depend.

Super? Bah!

Every time I look at you, I don’t understand
Why you do the things you do, to get so far ahead
You’re a nasty white ant, you had it really planned
To wait so close to election time to play your bloody hand
You trumped-up little arsehole, you get our full damnation
You use Facebook for your mass communication
Don’t get me wrong … I only want to know

Kevin Rudd: Egotist.
Who are you? Why has it come to this?
Kevin Rudd: Egotist.
Just who the hell does he think he is?


Reblab

They tried to make me vote for Kevin, I said no, no, no
Yes I tried that, but now that’s he’s back – no, no, no
I won’t give the job, not to Tony, Clive or Bob
But I’ll never vote for Kevin, no way – no, no, no

Kevvy horror show

I'm astounding
And I’m gloating
Gillard’s head has rolled
But listen closely...
’cos I’m getting much stronger...
I’m Kevin.  I’ve got control.

I remember doing the Time Warp.
Drinking those moments when
my reflection would stir me
And my voice would be calling ….

Let's do an election again.
Let's do an election again.

I took three steps to the right
And one more for luck
If you think you can live here
You can go and get ****ed

It’s the refugee shuffle
Send ’em off to PPP-NG
Can Tony win? No, he can’t!
I’m to right of Genghis Khan.

Gentle Kevin

Campaign Kevin, with smirky smile,
Acts just like a little child;
Pity his simplicity,
Can hardly even count to three.


Kev’s in heaven

Kevin - he’s in heaven
But he smiles so much
that he can hardly speak
And he seems to find
the happiness he seeks
when he’s by himself
spruiking on the street.

Kevin - he’s in heaven
And his ego
shines so strong
it blinds the plebs.
Seems to fog
the tiny brains
inside their heads
When he’s in the Canberra
MPs quake in dread

Oh,
He loves it on the hustings
In a city or outback track
But he don't enjoy it half
As much as knifing
Swannie in the back

We love Kevin

We love, Kevin; oh, yes we do
We love, Kevin; oh, yes we do
We love, Kevin; oh, yes we do
For KRudd tells us so.

God save us

God save us from KRudd
God save us from his hand
God save our land.
He’s so vain/glorious:
boring, laborious.
God save us from KRudd
Please save our land.

Non-national Anthem

Strayans all, let’s make a choice
to switch off our tee-vees
We've had enough, of political guff,
Our screens are full of he.
The time has come to show our hands
to tell him we don’t care.
Let’s turn the page, toss him off stage
Call guidance from above.
Donate our wage, maintain the rage
Give Kevin Rudd the shove.

© eoin machdugail July 2013

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