DREAD HEAD

I woke up yestreen full of dread
deep dark places inside me head
didn’t want to hurt myself
(not too keen to be dead)
just lots of shit I had to shed
there’s something in me that just ain’t right
something in me brain’s gone a bit bad
’cos the most insignificant things make me mad

I beat myself up, psychologically,
there’s many solutions but I just can’t see
I tell myself I’m an idiot, a fool
so many times it’s become the rule
my use of the cane has rewired me brain
I wonder, at times, if I’m on the edge of insane
I’ve gotta change. I know I do,
but inside me head’s all black, no hue
I see tunnel at the end of the light
instead of a life that’s shining and bright

I’m better than this, I know I am,
just need to find a positive plan
to clear my head of the shitful dread
a good start might be to see a shrink
to break things down, reduce the stink
I know that I know that me head’s all clogged
but I know I don’t know what’s causing the bog
I love my Lyn, my patient wife,
just gotta take the steps to get back my life
to bring myself back from the scary edge
I’ll take that step – that’s my pledge.
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1903 - 111215

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