Photo - Southern Highlander News
Can Do (a political pantomime)
Done a-la Gilbert and Sullivan
My name is Campbell Newman
I’m the leader of the pack
When it comes to fair-go treatment
We’re just a bunch of brats
When it came to choose No.1
Who better than a Lord Mayor
I’m unelected, well, that’s true
But the back room boys don’t care
I’m Can-Do Campbell
Jeeze, I’m great
I used to run the council
And next I’ll run the state
Singers: (He used to run the council, and next he’ll run the state)
It’s like the state of origin
With mates against their mates
The way it’s going the LNP
Can’t help but disintegrate
Which one is the Mexican?
Which one is the toad?
No matter who and what they are
The party will implode
I’m Can-Do Campbell
I always get my way
Take no notice of what I do
Just do what I say
(Take no notice of what he does, just do what he says)
We had to toss out JPL
The dentist from the coast
He had no mongrel in his soul
When we needed it the most
I suppose it was a bastard act
But John Paul was no loss
And when it comes playing fair
I couldn’t give a bloody toss
I’m Can-Do Campbell
And I’m first class
When I bend to touch me feet
The sun shines out me arse
(When he bends to touch his feet, the sun shines out his arse)
Larry went ... and Hobbsy too
We cleaned out our front bench
You’ll see new faces on the floor
Hell, we’ve even got a wench!
We’re all really closet Liberals
But to please the country folk
And keep the peace in parliament
We chose a country bloke
I’m Can-Do Campbell
I’ve got no policy
I’ll just do what I want to do
just you wait and see
(He’ll just do what he wants to do, just you wait and see)
Our new leader in the house
Is me old mate Jeffrey Seeney
When it some to gutter politics
He can be downright meany
Jeff goes all red and flares his cheeks
Like a stirred up bush goanna
And gives it all he’s got, and more
To take on Hard Hat Anna
I’m Can-Do Campbell
And I’m Number1
When I take on Anna Bligh
I’ll kick her up the bum
(When he takes on Anna Bligh, he’ll kick her up the bum)
As the party’s newborn leader
I’ll roam rural and remote
And point out Anna’s failings
In a bid to snare your vote
Hey we’ve got no power or budget
Our promises are a joke
But we’ll convince you to ignore
All the mirrors and the smoke
I'm Can-Do Campbell
And I ain’t got much hair
But when I look into the mirror
I just see a premier
(But when he looks into the mirror, he just sees a premier)
So when it comes to voting time
There’s one thing I should mention
My name is Campbell Newman
In my own mind: I’m a legend.
© eoin macdhugail April 2011
Done a-la Gilbert and Sullivan
My name is Campbell Newman
I’m the leader of the pack
When it comes to fair-go treatment
We’re just a bunch of brats
When it came to choose No.1
Who better than a Lord Mayor
I’m unelected, well, that’s true
But the back room boys don’t care
I’m Can-Do Campbell
Jeeze, I’m great
I used to run the council
And next I’ll run the state
Singers: (He used to run the council, and next he’ll run the state)
It’s like the state of origin
With mates against their mates
The way it’s going the LNP
Can’t help but disintegrate
Which one is the Mexican?
Which one is the toad?
No matter who and what they are
The party will implode
I’m Can-Do Campbell
I always get my way
Take no notice of what I do
Just do what I say
(Take no notice of what he does, just do what he says)
We had to toss out JPL
The dentist from the coast
He had no mongrel in his soul
When we needed it the most
I suppose it was a bastard act
But John Paul was no loss
And when it comes playing fair
I couldn’t give a bloody toss
I’m Can-Do Campbell
And I’m first class
When I bend to touch me feet
The sun shines out me arse
(When he bends to touch his feet, the sun shines out his arse)
Larry went ... and Hobbsy too
We cleaned out our front bench
You’ll see new faces on the floor
Hell, we’ve even got a wench!
We’re all really closet Liberals
But to please the country folk
And keep the peace in parliament
We chose a country bloke
I’m Can-Do Campbell
I’ve got no policy
I’ll just do what I want to do
just you wait and see
(He’ll just do what he wants to do, just you wait and see)
Our new leader in the house
Is me old mate Jeffrey Seeney
When it some to gutter politics
He can be downright meany
Jeff goes all red and flares his cheeks
Like a stirred up bush goanna
And gives it all he’s got, and more
To take on Hard Hat Anna
I’m Can-Do Campbell
And I’m Number1
When I take on Anna Bligh
I’ll kick her up the bum
(When he takes on Anna Bligh, he’ll kick her up the bum)
As the party’s newborn leader
I’ll roam rural and remote
And point out Anna’s failings
In a bid to snare your vote
Hey we’ve got no power or budget
Our promises are a joke
But we’ll convince you to ignore
All the mirrors and the smoke
I'm Can-Do Campbell
And I ain’t got much hair
But when I look into the mirror
I just see a premier
(But when he looks into the mirror, he just sees a premier)
So when it comes to voting time
There’s one thing I should mention
My name is Campbell Newman
In my own mind: I’m a legend.
© eoin macdhugail April 2011
